The Angry Infertile in me is back...

Or, maybe I should say the extremely pissed off infertile is back. I had a similar encounter today with my old RE clinic as Polly had Monday. I like how she said it - "What kind of monkey shop are you running here??"

A little background:
We are finally nearing the end of un-medicated, pretending to be normal people and are within weeks of beginning our next, and third, IVF with our new RE - Dr. K. I called my new nurse today, sweet Rita, to make an appointment to discuss our protocol. Turns out, R needs a semen analysis with their lab, so Rita and I scheduled that appointment. Dr. K couldn't see me the same day, so my appointment is Tuesday (R's is Friday). Then, Rita tells me that my old RE has yet to send the remainder of my file to them and they haven't sent anything over on R. SERIOUSLY? I requested his 12/1 and mine weeks before that.

I hang up with Rita and call the old RE to leave a message - because they never answer the freaking phone. This chick calls me back (during my weekly team call and I have to put my manager on hold) and says, "We've sent your information 3 times now. You have to re-fax your medical release (don't worry - when I sent it over the first 3 times I put an expiration date of like 6.1.09 - but, noooo...they need it again). I argued with her, but basically gave in to get my boss off of hold. Whatever. So, I send it back after explaining to her that she would not need to send me my records for a 4th time if they'd just included everything the first time. 15 minutes later I get this email:

Good day Ms. R's wife,
As per our phone conversation a moment ago, I will need to have a new "Signed Medical Record Release Form" (see attachment) from you indicating "Infectious Disease" in order for us to provide that information again. Additionally may I suggest that you allow us to send your records to you directly so that you can copy and distribute as needed.
I am sorry that you appear to be dissatisfied with our process. Our records show that we provided your Medical Records as per your request on the following dates:
08/18/2008
10/29/2008
12/01/2008
Your request below would represent the 4th. time we would be requested to provide your records and your further request via phone earlier that this be provided immediately is unfortunately not possible. For your protection and in observance of HIPPA LAWS, we do not keep hard copies of patients medical records once a request has been satisfied. I will process your additional request once the completed attachment is returned to us at 770-WE-SUCK. Remember that our standard processing time is 5 business days.

Have a wonderful day.
Dumb Ass

NO. SHE. DIDN'T. My blood pressure must have been 800 over 500. "I am sorry that you appear to be dissatisfied with our process" - appear? Sweetheart, if you don't know I am dissatisfied (is that a word? or is it unsatisfied??) maybe you are the one who needs to see a doctor. She also copied her boss on the email, who was surprisingly out of the office today. Go figure. On a side note, I had called my old IVF nurse there twice by this time, asking for her help. It's 8:45 PM now, and she still hasn't called back. I find it hard to believe she was that busy. Anyway, my response:

Dumb and Dumber -

The release form I just faxed in today is for infectious diseases for both my husband and me.

I AM dissatisfied - with the entire practice. I started this infertility journey over 2 years ago and was referred to your practice with a glowing recommendation from my OB/GYN. From the beginning, my calls were always taken at your convenience and my questions were answered with as little detail as possible. In January of last year when I first visited {Insert Old RE here}, my diagnosis was viewed as "very easily solved". After a chemical pregnancy in March, I was given little comfort or information on what exactly was happening with my body. After 1 failed IVF attempt, I was told at 29 that the only way I would ever get pregnant was by donor egg. After that IVF, I basically had to tell my doctors what protocol I wanted to use and what route I wanted to take - try IVF again or go back to IUI. What had seemed at the outset a very "easy" problem to solve became a doom and gloom situation every time I spoke to someone at your office. From the first blood test results, every encounter I had with anyone on you staff was a negative experience.

While this is a job for you and you are around hormone enraged women every day on their life's quest to become a Mother, this is MY LIFE. My husband and I are trying to grow our family with very little success - something no one ever dreams would happen. I've wanted to be a mother from the day I was born and your practice has, in so many words, told me that I will never have a biological child of my own. As I try to move on with my life and away from your practice, I continue to have negative experiences. All I want is my ENTIRE medical information from your practice - including my husband's. An ENTIRE medical information pack would include items such as:

Infectious Diseases
Cystic Fibrosis Testing
Semen Analysis
Lab Log
Procedure Documentation
Any other records you have about me or my spouse - since I am not a medical professional - I may not know the medical jargon

While becoming a mother has been a struggle for me, THIS shouldn't be a struggle - to obtain my medical information that you have at your practice. I should not have to be a medically trained professional to request an entire medical information package from my experiences as your patient.

I have had to continue to request this information because you have either not provided it to Dr. K at my request or you did not provide my entire file to me when I requested it be sent to me. If you will just send me every ounce of information you have on me or my spouse, I can move on with my life and not ever have to deal with {Insert Old RE here} again.

Please send all information to me at 867-5309 **(don't you love my number??)** as I requested in my Medical Release Form fax today.

Thank you (I really wanted to close with Eat Shit - but, you know, in the kindest way possible),
Tara

Really people? You're protecting me by not giving me or my new RE the records we need to move forward? HIPPA can kiss my ass - I think my email requesting this information MULTIPLE times would pass an audit. Also infuriating is the fact that you basically have to be a friggin' doctor to request your "Entire Medical Record" by asking for specific things. People, I have an accounting degree. Give me some numbers - I am cool. Give me some bullshit Latin term that means something as universal as "Hello" and I am lost and I don't care about finding my way back. If its fucking rocket science to request your medical records, why not give your patients a list with items to check off that they may want on the medical release form? Is it not suffice to say - "Hey - I'm leaving your practice. You have wasted an entire year of my life and I have been miserable every single time I've had to see your face, speak your name, see your number on my caller ID or hear your latest string of bad news - please give me my medical file so I can take it to a doctor that might actually be able to get me pregnant."

Well, I feel better. I told you - SHE'S BAAAAAAAAACK.....

**Update - my old IVF nurse did actually call me back yesterday. I just didn't check my voicemail until midnight last night. I hate voicemail, so it's a wonder I even checked it then. So, maybe she doesn't suck quite as bad as I thought.

Who am I kidding? She's the one who said to me over the summer - "Well, at least you know you've tried everything possible." (This was before we tried IVF for the 2nd time. Really? 1 failed IVF lady? With no fertilization and no chance to even SEE if my body would accept some embys? Yep...she still sucks.

Yes, without a doubt....SHE'S BACK! Welcome home, ol' girl!!!