This could be the beginning...

I am thinking I will start my period tonight or tomorrow first thing. I woke up with cramps, have had mild spotting all day and the cramps are still here. Oh, and I am STARVING. Thank goodness. This wait has been on my last nerve. I also have a business trip in 2 weeks that I would prefer not to cancel. I could (and will if needed) - but, it's a meeting for a council that I have been a very active part of for 2 years and I would just feel shady backing out.

For the most part, we've told our friends that we think we're just going to take the rest of the year off. I can't take any more of the daily questions and the comments of "I just KNOW this is going to be the month." Frankly, I am just not sure. I don't have a good or bad feeling about this cycle. I'm just over my current RE and nurse - so, I guess I'm just indifferent.

I called Nurse and left her a VM. She just called me back and I go in Monday for my baseline (assuming I start tomorrow which all signs currently point to yes). We'll start injections of Follistim on Monday (or Day 3 of my cycle) and will plan to continue those for 10 days. They treat an IUI with injectibles the same as an IVF cycle...I wonder if all REs do? Dr. K (2nd opinion) said that when I do IVF with him, that he'd out me on 225 of Follistim twice per day - so, the same amount as Dr. T - but twice instead of 1 shot of 450 all at once. I wonder if I should self medicate and do 2 shots per day....

I wish I had a lot of confidence in Dr. T. I just get the feeling that they are just humoring me with trying IUI with Follistim. It's a shitty way to feel.

I'm trying to tell myself (and believe) that this could be the beginning of something very wonderful.